Character, then Happiness

Photo by Jill Wellington on Pexels.com

Yes, God wants us to be happy.

But it’s not #1 on His list of priorities.

It isn’t #1 on any parent’s list of priorities.

Why?

I want my kids to happy. But this doesn’t mean I want them to have whatever they want at every moment. What’s much more important than their feelings at this moment is the character they are developing.

Parental Prioritites

I want my kids to have a relationship with God and care about what He wants.

I want my kids to be responsible and reliable.

I want my kids to be kind, respectful, and unselfish.

I want my kids to be disciplined and able to follow through with their commitments even when they’d rather be relaxing.

I want my kids to be honest and trustworthy.

I want my kids to value people over stuff.

All of these goals are higher priorities than their happiness.

What about happiness?

The irony is that these things ultimately bring a great deal of happiness… eventually. Maybe not today. Maybe not this moment. Maybe not even this week. But in the long run.

In the long run, these things will bring more happiness than if they seek their own happiness at every moment. Ironically, seeking happiness as a goal doesn’t work. When happiness is the goal, it will always be out of reach. Happiness is a byproduct of reaching other goals.

Happiness comes naturally when you achieve something you’ve worked hard for. It comes naturalky when you help another person reach their goals. It comes naturally when you’re giving for the right reasons and when you’ve made another person happy (although you have to be careful with that one, because indiscriminate people-pleasing will make you miserable).

God’s highest goal is certainly not our happiness, but He has created people in such a way that we tend to become happy as we meet His other goals.

So why do we fight Him

Temporary Discomfort

I have trouble wanting to control things I can’t control. When things are going my way, I temporarily feel much better… temporarily. Until things are not going my way again. Until things feel out of control again.

The long-term solution is to trust God and stop trying to control things myself. In order for that to happen, I need to practice being in situations where I can’t control things. And then I need to practice trusting God in those situations. These situations are very uncomfortable in the moment. They stretch my faith, and stretching is not comfortable.

But imagine having so much faith that unexpected, seemingly out-of-control situations no longer bother me! That would be the end of my worrying, the end of my anxiety! It would be very uncomfortable getting there, but I’m a thousand times more likely to be happy when I’m not worrying.

So God’s methods may be painful – but the pain will be worth it. Eventually.

So where do you start?

If you’re wondering why you’re not happy, double-check whether you are doing what God wants you to do. Have you prayed today? If not, start there! You won’t regret it.you